How do i forgive?

We’re going to talk about forgiveness. 
Forgiving is a simple concept that is very difficult to master.
We say forgive and forget, but most people ‘forgive’ but don't forget. Most of us will forgive other people, but not forget.
We might remind the other person over and over again that they hurt them. We might hold onto the pain, instead of the love in that forgiveness. We might hold on to the pain of what happened to us for our entire life. Even though we say that we have forgiven, some of us will just refuse to forgive.
‘That I can never forgive.’
‘That's something that can never be forgiven.’ 
‘Too bad ~ I will never forgive that.’ 
Those are the vines that reach outward from the root of the pain that happened; growing out from that hurt inside us, infiltrating every moment of your day, getting longer and longer, more and more tangled with each day that goes by, with you holding onto that pain, resisting and refusing to forgive.
When you refuse to forgive others, it doesn't hurt them.
OK, it might hurt them a little that you didn't forgive them, but mostly they're going to move on with their life without you, and they're not going to pay attention to it.
When you don't forgive them, it hurts you. It hurts you.
Forgiving others is not about them. It's always about you.
Forgiving someone else is about your soul.
It's about healing your wounds. It's about what you need to fix and heal inside of yourself.

Storytime...
I'm going to tell you a story. A friend of mine needed some help…
I'm going to explain it this way to you and I want you to take the advice that I gave him in the same way. And as I tell you this story, I want you to think about that person in your life who hurt you; the perpetrator, the person who injured you, the person who broke your heart, the person that changed you, scarred you, traumatized you...  
***trigger warning***
In his late teens, this friend of mine had a woman in his life that he loved more than anything. It was the mid-1980s, and while they were involved they lived on the streets, in abandoned buildings, small studios, hotel rooms in bad neighborhoods. One day, she was grabbed off the street, dragged into a back alley, and basically raped and beaten by several men.
A horrible terrible thing to happen to her, no doubt.
My friend, of course, was enraged but there was no justice and no finding the culprits. 
My friend and I had this discussion in 2016.
He had lived his entire life getting into fist fights at the drop of a hat.
He still carried so much rage, so much anger, so much pain, so much just hatred of the world for what happened to his lady.
He lived his entire life feeling like those people were unforgivable. There was no way to forgive those people, EVER, for what they had done, EVER. 
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This was the advice that I gave him and this is the advice that I give you right now. 
Every human on this planet is a mortal vessel, housing a Divine being. 
Every single mortal on this planet is a vessel housing a Divine being. 
They are born pure and they are born perfect and each one is on a journey in their life. 
Each one goes through experiences and pains and traumas that change them. Each goes through experiences that change them to their core. 
Experiences that change them sometimes beyond the recognition of humanity, love, mercy and compassion. Experiences that can change them to the point that they don't understand how to process the amount of pain that they carry inside of them. 
They don't understand how to process the amount of hurt and trauma that they themselves have been put through. So much pain and trauma, that the only thing that they know how to do with that pain that they lived through, is to then put it on to others; 
is to lash out 
is to then be the abuser 
Is to be the person who is hurting others 
Is to be the beater 
Is to be the abuser 
Is to be the person who needs to have the power... 

This is in no way condoning the actions of those who do wrong. 
But inside of every killer, 
inside of every abuser, 
inside of every person who is committing crimes against humanity, 
Inside of every person committing crimes against children, 
Inside every one of them is a Divine being trapped inside a mortal vessel of pain; trapped inside a whirlwind of suffering; 
They are trapped inside a reality that they have created within their own mind, with their own self talk and their own self conversations full of suffering and Hell. 
The only way that they know how to get that pain and hurt out is to abuse others, is to hurt others, is to kill others, is to bomb others, is to explode others, is to shoot others. 
It's not right... it's never, ever the right thing, but they don't know any other way. 

The victimizer usually started out as a victim... 
We as the ‘Awakening’ are always in the process of self awareness and self healing. This allows us to look back at our abusers, at the ones who have hurt us, at the ones who have put this upon us. We have to look at our abusers through the eyes of empathy. We have to look at them through the eyes of compassion, even though they are the ones who committed these hurtful acts; 
even though they put this pain upon us; 
even though they are the ones that were in the wrong;
even though they have done this. 
We as the ‘Awakening’ have to be the ones to extend the healing of empathy towards those who are in so much pain that pain becomes the only language they understand. Lashing out with violence and anger becomes the only way they can express their pain. We have to extend them empathy and compassion. 

This is part 11 of a series of excerpt from Simple Spirituality of Self e-book channeled by me during my Awakening
If you would like to read the entire book NOW for $3 and support the continuous exploration of this Awakening we all share- Click this link
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